April 2, 2018 – Raglan, New Zealand
Trying new things is hard but rewarding. Why is that so hard to remember? Sometimes the fear and anxiety are so much to overcome, but it’s been rare (if it’s ever happened in life) that I think it wasn’t worth overcoming them. Also, the more the anxiety, the bigger the reward.
So, what is it that makes us avoid it? This lesson has been taught to me a million times in life, but I just keep ignoring it to keep myself in my comfort zone. But what happens when I get out of my comfort zone?
- I meet people who resonate with me on a really extreme level
- I go on adventures to places I’ve only dreamed of / read about / heard about
- I learn about things I like that fill gaps I didn’t know I had
- I get jobs that are (at least for a time) really rewarding
So, all in all, it doesn’t seem that bad. The anxiety is momentary and the outcomes are forever (and sometimes life-changing). But here I am, sitting in the corner of my hostel, alone, when everyone else is drinking and partying together. Now it appears they’re all getting a shuttle somewhere together. I’m 100 years old. Is it imposter syndrome, or am I actually 100 years old? Probably the latter.
I was literally about to write something about it maybe just being ok to prefer small groups and being alone, and out of my journal popped a card from the yoga retreat that said, “Suspend your preferences. They may be getting in your way.” Ok, Universe, ok. I’ll join the fucking party…
I did join the party. We went to a bar with a live band. I met a 21-year-old British girl who was in New Zealand on a study abroad. I told her what it’s like to be in your 30s. We both had a crush on the same 26-year-old surfing instructor. It was a good night.
Check out this post to start Joy’s journey from the beginning.
For more from Joy, check out her Know Your Worth interview.